The Return

Instead of going to Placencia, a tiny beach town on the tip of a penninsula in the south of Belize, I've decided to stay in San Ignacio through the weekend, and thus, the remainder of my trip before I head back to the States tomorrow. The weather has been absolutely beautiful the last couple of days, and I have been doing a lot of scouting, walking, chatting, all things I didn't imagine I'd have time to do. The main reasons why I decided not to head south were because Dolores (Martha's sister) is coming in from Belize City today, and I am very eager to see her. It is their mother's 90th birthday today. Dolores and I spent a lot of time together when I was teaching; this was back when she had a house out on the western highway. I really have enjoyed her company and friendship, and I look forward to reuniting with her.

The other reason was because I had hoped to spend a good deal more time with Rosario yesterday, who got a commission to do the abdominal massage and healing spa work for a group of 10 in San Pedro for an entire week. She waited for me at the bus stop in San Jose Succotz, and because I was a little later than the time we had said, she went back to her home. Her son Gramson, 14, walked with me there, and we met her as she was coming out with her bag, destined again for the road, and her 4+ hour venture out to the cayes. We spend a little bit of time at her altar, where she produced her sastun for me -- a stone that a shaman will use to direct healing energy, usually given to them by another shaman, or if indoctinated by the spirits, it is one that the medium will encounter. This one, a beautiful, shell-shaped, heavy, palm-sized sandy, worn stone with a nipple-like cusp perched at the top, was given to her by her abuelo famoso. She let me hold it, and its energy was very deep, very internal, I could feel it sucking my energy into it. I wondered why that was, and asked Rosario. Sometimes, it doesn't feel like that, she said, but when you have more to give than you are ready to receive, the stone will hold the energy for you to direct as you feel best. She said that was a really good thing. It was kind of scary to me, like a black hole of space taking in what it needed. I'm not sure why it made me feel uneasy. Did it feel greedy? Did I not know how to read it. I held it longer, put my other hand over the top of it, and then, it shifted. The energy seemed to be radiating out from it through me, and I felt it best to hand back to her since I wanted time for this, and more importantly, I wanted to find my sastun, not be at the service of someone else's. I am on the lookout, but I have a feeling I won't find it this trip.

I walked to the Casa de Suenos on Trapeche Road today -- the beautiful (in my memory) two-leveled house in Santa Elena, just down from the Low Bridge, with an upper floor of side-by-side portico windows and gorgeous landscaping. It had changed entirely. No one has occupied the house the entire time that I've been gone. It was looking very sad; all the beautiful surrounding folliage gone from no upkeep, gated up and a neighborhood watch sign in front of it. I had such amazing dreams about what I could do with this house: a yoga retreat, a sanctuary for artists, recently I have fantasized about Carson using a portion of the lower section as a recording studio. It would take a lot of work to fix up that house now. Although, I'm sure with the housing market the way it is in the US, it would be possible to purchase it for far under list. It would probably be a blessing for Elbert Flowers to get it off his hands. Perhaps I'll see if Dolores knows any more information about it.

I'm posting pictures of the girls who were my students, Martha and John, Dora -- such a sweet, dear friend. All the faces of my trip that I have looked forward to seeing again. I hope to be back very, very soon.

Ojala que vaya con dios en sus viajes indivduales...

con carino amor,

soy yo